Parents Are Not Responsible For Bad Behaviors in Kids

Hi everyone! This is a argumentative essay I wrote for school. I hope you like it and feel free to comment. ❀◕ ‿ ◕❀

Parents Are Not Responsible For Bad Behaviors in Kids

Written by Lynne Chen

Something that people often see in public is the scene of a child misbehaving. Sometimes it is but human nature to wonder, “Why aren't the parents doing anything?” Although it is easy to play the blame game and lay all responsibility on the mom and dad, parents should not be held responsible for all the wrong things a child does. A child could have a mental illness or a certain disorder that causes them not to think through their actions and do things that aren't right. In addition, this generation is filled with bad influences that could change a child’s behavior. Kids are little and grow everyday; their body grows, their education grows, and their knowledge grows yet children have a mind of their own and cannot be controlled. As long as a parent does his/her job to try and teach kids what behaviors are right, they should not be blamed for incorrect actions made by the child.

Often children who misbehave are children who cannot help themselves. Many kids suffer from conduct disorder, ADHD, post-traumatic stress disorder, and many other types of special needs that make it harder for them to understand what they are doing is wrong. At school there are special classes to help them where there are teachers specially trained to help guide children who need extra help. Teachers will go through certain techniques that help children understand better although sometimes many don’t do it correctly. Through many experiments and hidden cameras, many special education classes are found trying to educate children about behavior by punishing them through tying them to chairs, locking them in closets, pinning them to the floor, strapping them down, or by leaving them isolated. The challenges of teaching these special education classes show that even with extra training, teaching children can be hard and stressful even for professionals. Therefore, it is not difficult to understand why a parent would have a difficult time educating their children. “What it's like to be a parent: It's one of the hardest things you'll ever do but in exchange it teaches you the meaning of unconditional love,” said Nicolas Sparks, a famous writer and father of five kids. Even for someone who is successful and rich, as well as can afford better things for his children than most people, it is hard for him to teach his children the right behaviors. It is often difficult for a parent with no training to try to teach and help their child learn right from wrong. Without knowing the circumstance of the family we should not just say that all actions from the kid are completely the fault of the mom and dad. If children should misbehave it isn’t correct to hold the parent responsible.

Many people claim that if children misbehave it is the responsibility of the parent to be stricter and make kids learn through forms of lecturing and punishment. This is a terrible misconception. Every day many parents punish their child through humiliation or threats like grounding them, hitting them, ignoring them, humiliating them in public, and many other hurtful methods to try to get their child to learn. Children learn from love and care not by scolding and hitting. A parent is the hero and the role model of their own child so children learn from their parents. If a child is scolded by his/her parent all he/she will do is continue to misbehave. Punishing children will just encourage them to become sneakier and continue to do the bad things they do. This gives them a sense of rebellion and defiance. Harold Hulbert, a writer and father, say that, “Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it.” This is completely true. When children are misbehaving there is probably something disturbing him/her; there is probably a psychological reason why they are doing something wrong. When a child is misbehaving, that is the perfect time to express concern and love not force. It is the parents’ job to teach their child but if their child doesn't listen to his/her parents warning there is nothing they can do. Parents could scold their child and hit them but the children will not learn. If a parent does try to do their very best, the child should be the only one responsible for his/her behaviors.

What is the definition of a good parent? A good parent is a mom or dad that loves and cares for their child. A good parent takes the time and patience to teach their kid the right thing, but in a world filled with bad influences a child could pick up bad behaviors from a friend or another peer. Judith Rich Harris, an American psychologist, claims that “A child who grows up in a disciplined household is just as likely to turn into a tear away as those raised in chaotic homes, if they mix with unruly classmates at a young age.” It is often said that a peer’s influence is stronger than that of a parent and this is often true. In the modern world a good parent can still have a bad child. Each person is an individual and each child has a mind of their own that could be easily changed or manipulated. A child’s bad behavior can come from a friend or someone outside of the family, therefore good parents could still have bad children.

Everyone makes mistakes especially children who are still trying to learn right from wrong. Children all around the world misbehave no matter what their age. Often times some people don’t get mad at the kids but rather at the parent who takes care of them. Often times people tend to judge each other so fast without knowing any details other than the fact that a child is being bad. Parent should not be held fully responsible for bad behaviors of a kid especially if the accuser is accusing without knowing the circumstance of the family because the child could have a disorder or suffered through a traumatic event.  A parent should also not always be responsible because good parents can have misbehaving children especially in our generation that is filled with television, magazines, drugs, friends, and other things that could mislead a young person. A parent who tries very hard to try to make a child understand what to do and what not to do should never be held responsible for only negative actions.